


Post "Three Words" missing scene

by scullybuck



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Angst, Episode: s08e16 Three Words, Missing Scene, Post "Three Words" missing scene, Sad with a Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-29
Updated: 2020-03-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 23:22:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23385211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scullybuck/pseuds/scullybuck
Summary: Mulder is alive, and Scully brings him home. They have the saddest, most awkward conversation, and we never get any resolution. Until now.
Relationships: Fox Mulder/Dana Scully
Comments: 2
Kudos: 58





	Post "Three Words" missing scene

Mulder and Scully walked into number 42 Hegal Place. Scully had his small duffle bag from the hospital in hand. 

“Must feel good to be home,” Scully stated, trying to break the awkward silence. 

“Mmm,” Mulder grunted. Scully took the bag into the bedroom and came back out into the living room as Mulder said, “Something looks different.”

A little uncomfortable, Scully replied, “It’s clean.” Mulder chuckles an empty little laugh. The tension was tangible.  
“Ah... that's it.” He acknowledged. Scully nervously fingered her keys as Mulder leans over his fish tank. “I’m missing a Molly,” he observed. 

“Yeah, she wasn't as lucky as you.” Mulder sat on the edge of his desk. Scully searched for the right words. “Mulder... I don't know if you'll ever understand what it was like. First learning of your abduction... and then searching for you and finding you dead. And now to have you back…” she whispered, her voice breaking.

“Well, you act like you're surprised.” Mulder quipped. He chuckled a bit, but Scully didn’t. He grew quiet again and looked down, almost sadly. 

“I prayed a lot. And my prayers have been answered,” Scully cried, never taking her eyes off of Mulder.

Mulder finally acknowledged the elephant in the room. He gestured towards Scully’s very-pregnant belly. “In more ways than one.” 

“Yeah,” she nodded, also looking at her stomach. 

“I'm happy for you,” he stated unconvincingly, obviously having difficulty making eye contact. “I think I know... how much that means to you.”

Scully hesitated, not knowing what to say, and looking as if she were about to burst into tears.

“Mulder...” She begged, wounded.

“I'm sorry… I don't mean to be cold or ungrateful. I just... I have no idea where I fit in…right now. I just, uh... I'm having a little trouble... processing... everything.”

Scully stared at him, not knowing what to say. 

She bit her lip, holding back tears, trying to understand, but still feeling deeply hurt. She felt so much but couldn’t put it into words, her mind whirling with so many things she wants to say but that she didn’t think he was willing to hear yet. “I’m uh…I’m gonna go.” She turned to leave and he finally looked up as she opened the door. “Call me if you need anything, Mulder,” she called back, her voice breaking.

“Scully, wait. Scully…” She didn’t slow down. He got up and went after her, knowing he had royally screwed up, but feeling oddly numb about it. He knew the old Mulder would have never been so cold to her, never would have hurt her, would have comforted her and wiped away her tears, would have celebrated with her and been happy because she was happy…but as much as he knew he should feel and do all those things, he didn’t feel…anything. He has no idea what he was going to say when he caught up to her. She had just hit the down button as he got to the elevator. “Scully…please.” He took her arm and she turned, tears glistening in her eyes. She still didn’t look at him. 

“I’m sorry.” He really did mean it, but he had a hard time making it sound sincere. He felt so out of place and lost. He didn’t know what he wanted, but he knew he didn’t want to hurt her. Scully closed her eyes and sighed. “Mulder…” She finally opened her eyes looked up at him. “It’s fine. I just want to go home. It’s been a long week.” She turned to leave but the elevator still hadn’t come up. She reached for the down button again and her keys slipped out of her hand. She bent to reach for them, but in her condition Mulder got to them first. She turned and grabbed at her Apollo 11 keychain in his hand, but he gripped the keys, looking her in the eyes.

“Just wait a second. Don’t leave mad, Scully.” 

“I’m not mad, Mulder. I’m…tired.” 

“I imagine you are.” He looked at her belly for a minute, and she dreaded the awkwardness once again, but his expression and tone were a bit softened. He surprised her and reached out to place his palm on her round belly. She looked down at his hand and smiled a small, weary, tearful smile. He shifted his hand around a bit, a satisfied grin on his face, taking it in. Some part of him knows this was the right thing to do. He knew it was what she needed, what she expected. He didn’t get the joy out of it that he knew he should, but he was sure that in time he would. 

She looked up into his face, trying to read him. Mulder was always a hard one to read, but she had become pretty good at it over the years. He was far from an open book, but if anyone could tell what he was thinking, she could. He was happy for her, really, on some level. She knew he was. But she could tell there was still something bothering him, something in the way, and that, in turn, bothered her. But he was making an effort for her, and she was thankful for that. 

She rested her hand on his, and their eyes met for a moment. The look on his face was one of pain, and confusion, but also joy and fascination. She stroked his hand with her thumb. She had thought of this moment dozens of times. It had gone nothing like this, but she was just glad it was happening at all. Mulder was really here. He was feeling the tiny kicks of her unborn child, and he was really, really here. Alive. She wanted to hold onto him, to cry and tell him everything she had wished she had told him before he had gone missing. But he was already dealing with so much and trying to adjust, and she was trying to be empathetic and not dump all the weight she had been carrying for months on him all at one time. But with everything that had transpired coupled with her pregnancy hormones, she was afraid her emotions were going to get the better of her. So she thought it best to leave, let him rest, and there would be time for everything else later. 

He pulled his hand away and took her hand, turning it palm-side up. He placed her keys in it, and the elevator doors opened. 

“Be careful Scully.” She pressed her lips together in an “okay, thanks”, stepped onto the elevator, and turned to face him. They watched each other, expressionless until the doors came together. 

*******************************************************

NEXT DAY  
7:38PM

Scully was hanging dry cleaning in the closet in her bedroom. A pile of jackets and coats covered in plastic was laid out on her bed. She heard a knock at her door. She sighed, looking with exasperation in the direction of the front door. Everything is a chore these days. Taking a shower and getting dressed seemed to take her three times as long as it used to. She realized last night she had worn two different shoes all day. She hooked the last three articles of clothing on the rod and headed (somewhat waddling) to the front door. She peered through the peephole, standing on her tip-toes. It was Mulder. She was glad but anxious at the same time. How would this go? The fact she had to ask herself that question made her sad. 

She opened the door, and he gave a sheepish grin and a small wave. Scully swung the door open wider so he could come in. As he did so, she closed the door behind him. When she turned to face him, he was suddenly very serious. “Scully, I’ve had some time. I…ummm…I can’t explain it. I can’t put into words what it’s like. I’m…,” he sighs, his hand in front of his chest, trying to demonstrate what he felt, brow furrowed, trying to find the right words. “I’m numb. I feel better than yesterday, but there’s still something I can’t put my finger on. But I want you to understand that it’s nothing personal. I was thinking and,” he shifts his feet, looking down at them for a moment, one hand in his pocket, the other he rubs across his mouth, thinking hard, “I can’t imagine how this has all been for you.” He finally looks her in the eyes. “I’ve had a hard time, I have,” he nods in affirmation, “but I’ve been selfish. I remember what it was like when you were taken. That was one of the hardest things I’ve ever faced. And I know I wouldn’t even be here if not for you. I didn’t know that at first. Skinner told me you worked on me and did everything you could.”

“I did. I didn’t have a lot of hope, but I had to try. Everything was pointing to it not working.” Her face scrunched up a bit, and she shook her head slightly. She could feel any strength she had to hold back all her emotions and all the words she needed to say fading rapidly. The dam was about to burst, so she just let it all flow. “Mulder…The past few days I have woken up in the morning thinking it’s a dream. I have a copy of your chart. I’ve had to look at it a couple times just to prove to myself that it’s true. I searched for you for months, and then when we found you…” She was almost weeping, her words coming out in sobs. “Your poor body was crumpled up on the ground, nothing on you but a blanket. I touched your face, I begged God and pleaded in any way that I could for it not to be true, willing with everything in me for you to open your eyes and look up at me. But you were cold and long gone. I could feel my heart breaking. I’d never felt so alone in my life. We buried you. I mourned you, Mulder. For months. I can’t truly believe that you’re really standing here.” Tears were streaming down her face. “It all seems like a bad dream.” She looked up at him and took a deep breath. “Mulder, I know you have been through a major trauma. I can’t say how I would feel or what I would do if I were you. But I want you to know that I went into your hospital room a week ago and laid my head on your chest and listened to your heart beating, thanking God that the impossible had happened. That you were really back. That there was hope. And I have needed one thing since then.”

“What’s that?”

She stepped forward and reached up, slowly wrapping her arms around his shoulders. He stood still for just the shortest moment before putting his arms around her. She held onto him tightly and sighed, closing her eyes and taking it in, his warmth, his scent, wearily leaning on him, tears of relief spilling out of her eyes, as if the pain that has been bottled up inside her had finally found a way out. Her soul was tired. She needed him to hold her, to help her carry it all. He rubbed her back with his palm and whispered, “It’s okay, Scully. I’m here.” At his words, he felt her let out a deep breath and relax into him. He found the familiarity of her comforting. Everything in his world, even his apartment, had seemed so foreign to him. He felt like a stranger in his own life. Even Scully was obviously different, but she was still Scully. She still felt familiar, smelled familiar. She was like an anchor when everything else in his world was swallowing him whole.

She smoothed his hair with her right hand, holding the back of his neck. “Mulder, do you remember when I was sick in Oregon? I knocked on your motel room door and you held me?”

“Yeah, not long before I was abducted. I don’t remember a lot from that time, but I remember that.”

“I found out the next day I was pregnant. Just moments before I found out you were taken.” She slowly released her grip on him a bit but before she let go, she pressed her lips against his cheek, taking in his scent and the roughness of his stubble, gently stroking the circular scars on his other cheek with her thumb and pulled back, looking into his eyes.

“You were pregnant back then? How far along… I thought…” His mouth hangs open slightly, all of it making sense now. “But how…?”

“Mulder, have you been thinking…” She looked down, smiling in relief, realizing all this time he’d been worried. He’d been thinking she’d moved on, that she had decided to have a child with someone else, that she buried him and had found someone and had somehow… Did he not realize…well of course he hadn’t done the math. He hadn’t had a chance to. 

“Mulder, did you think I’d…That’s what’s been wrong.” She nodded and smiled at him.

“Did you find a doctor who could…how…?” He wasn’t understanding it any better than she did when she found out. Scully was barren. At least that’s what three different doctors had told her. She shook her head, eyebrows raised, looking him in the eyes, telling him quickly that this wasn’t something she had planned, and that she didn’t have any more answers than he did. She was anxiously awaiting the moment the truth sank in completely. 

Mulder suddenly realized what this meant, and it was overwhelming to him. He was in shock, and surprised at the amount of emotion he was suddenly feeling compared to the emptiness that had enveloped his entire being since he had first woken up a week before. Everything he had feared was not only blown away, but this truth, this fact, what this meant to him, to Scully was enough to knock him off his feet. He looked at her, eyes wide, his mouth slightly hanging open in awe, searching her face, praying it was true.

He had told her so long ago to never give up on a miracle, that one day she could have a child, to not lose hope, and she hadn’t completely. She just never saw it happening like this, so naturally, so effortlessly. That night several months ago, in his apartment, she had woken up on the couch feeling more uninhibited that she had ever felt. She had finally closed a door on her past that day that she hadn’t even realized had been left ajar, and the toxicity of that haunting period of her life had been slowly poisoning her personal life for over a decade. She hadn’t been able to get close to anyone for so long because she still had one foot in the past. Now that was all behind her. She had truly believed that there was a reason she was there at that moment - that every minute decision she and Mulder had ever made had led them both this very place…this place at this time in his apartment with him sleeping in the next room. She had woken him in the middle of the night, slid into bed with him, and come away with more than she ever thought possible. She had thought of doing such a thing many times before, I mean how could she not. She was sure he had thought of her. He had said things to her before indicating as much. The way he looked at her, the way he touched her. There was no doubt he had longed for more, but had been afraid. She was always afraid. And her fear had built a fortress around her heart. Mulder could peek inside, but he could never get in. But that night her faith in life, in fate, and in him was stronger than any fear. And she had never regretted it. Not for one moment. 

She had imagined this, dreamed of this, the moment they could be together and talk about this, her child, their child, when she would see his pride and they could share this beautiful knowledge, when she could watch his eyes sparkle, knowing he was going to be a father, when he would realize the miracle they had never given up on had become a reality. She had long since given up on that dream, of him ever knowing, ever touching her swollen belly, ever holding their child. Suddenly a smile spread across his face, a beautiful smile, one she had missed terribly. “What are we havin’, Scully?” She could see dampness in his eyes. Her heart could have burst with the joy filling it. She smiled, tears streaming down her cheeks.

“I don’t know yet. I think I’m going to let it be a surprise.” He nodded, still beaming. 

“As long as it’s not an alien,” he chuckled, and she let out a small giggle. “Either way, I’m teaching the kid to play baseball as soon as possible, just so you know.”

“I wouldn’t have it any other way, Mulder.” Just then, she remembered something, her brows raise, eyes round and lit up, grinning from ear to ear. “Oh, come here," she exclaimed, waving him to follow, giddy with excitement.

She took his hand and nearly dragged him across the living room to her desk and picked up a small piece of paper. She turned to face him, beaming, and presented him with the blurry black and white image of their unborn child. She examined his face as he slowly took it from her hand and stared at it in awe, slowly sinking into the couch, never taking his eyes off it. Scully eased herself down next to him and watched him study every millimeter of the small image, her heart full and her every worry vanished. She heard him sniff, and saw him wipe his eyes. She hadn’t been this happy in years, possibly ever. She knew what true, pure joy felt like. She had everything. He looked over at her, smiled, wrapped his arm around her shoulders, and looked back at the picture. She laid her head on his chest and closed her eyes, having never felt more contended in her life. THE END


End file.
